21 October 2009

What Stops You?

Have you ever made a marketing plan that sounded good in your head or on paper, and discovered when you tried to put it into action that you have trouble forcing yourself into carrying out some of the items?

I developed a new marketing plan for a specific new project of mine this week, and have already found a pitfall.

Seems that what I thought I needed to do is requiring more effort to talk myself into than I anticipated. Does that happen to you?

What's the solution?

It's probably not the idea itself that's faulty. It's the assumptions behind it that haven't been completely made conscious, or thoroughly examined.

Sometimes it's the shoulds that get us. My pitfall action item is a should -- I thought I should attend more networking groups. But I hate those. I assume I'll feel awkward, I believe I won't know what to say. That brings up sabotaging fear. I reschedule, postpone, make excuses not to go.

Re-examining that should I remember that social networking isn't my strength. It's never going to be easy, I think. I'm never going to like it. Hmm, two more assumptions. Are they really true?

Will I be stopped on my road to achieving my goals by these assumptions? How can I coach myself (and you, if you're on the Should and Assumption road) out of this pitfall?

I ask myself (and you):
  • When you've felt awkward and scared before, what did you do to overcome it?
I took flower essence remedy Madia to strengthen my communication ability, and created a mental mantra to reinforce the sense of feeling comfortable, having fun, feeling accepted by strangers.
  • How can I make it easy?
I can start with small or purpose-focused groups, like workshops instead of meet and greets. That's easier because I can mostly listen. The pressure is off to talk about myself.
  • What do I need to experience so that I can like it, and how can I manifest that?
I need to feel a sense of comfort, belonging, and control. I can manifest that with convenient time and place, getting there without traffic, imagining being / playing the role of an extrovert, making a game of how many names I can remember or cards I can collect, being able to leave when I want, using my interviewing skills to start conversations, etc.

What about you? How have you gotten beyond being stopped before? How can you make it easy? What do you need to experience, and how can you manifest that?

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